Do i have to shout to be heard!!??

People are social animal. We like to be in group. However, everyone is unique in their own way. Most of the time, people gather around because of their similarities. Maybe because of their similar background, similar past experiences or similar hobbies and the lists goes on.

However, there are times when a group formed and there is one or two people are being left out. The feeling of being left out is miserable.

I have always having this feeling when going out with my group of best friends. However, sometimes i really doubting am i really a best fren for them?

There is always a gap between me and them. I totally freak out! I felt like i am different, i am strange. I understand everyone is different. I understand that the things we like, out taste, our thinking is different. And one of my fren once said, in a group, everyone has their own post to fill in. So am i here jus to fill in the one that being laughed at or being left out. I dun want to be the last one to know if anyone of my friends have any news. I care for them, it's not that i do not care. I just do not how to ask. I CARE. DO they just think i dun care?

I understand that my thinking pattern maybe different from them. However it is still hurt to being a STRANGER in A GROUP. I couldnt join in their conversation.

So one day, on my friends' graduation, i saw a guy, 'V' trying hard to join in conversation with these friends of mine. I SAW myself. I was crying inside myself. Suddenly i felt, why?.. ==

There are a lots of things that make me felt this way... This feeling would be understood by those who always have people listening when they talk. Am i have to SHOUT to get noticed? I dun like this... :(