Quotes of the day

I may have failed, but i'm not beaten..

I may have fallen, but i'm not lying dead...

I may seems lagging, but i'm resting...

As resting is for longer journey... 

Do not give up so easily, tough times wont last but tough guy do!

Mesin Waktu

Wah, ari ni bener2 bnyk pemikiran siah...

Selain mikirin exam, reply dari msg, dan masa lalu..

Swaktu makan siang ama Jem, Amin, Herman, tanpa sadar kita mulai ngomong tentang masa SMA. Ttg para guru yg sebagian uda tdk ada di SMA STY skrg dan bagaimana tingkah laku yg skrg liat akan terasa lucu... Gmn kita kerjain guru kita dsbnya...

Haha, walao ari ni bnyk percakapan ttg 3 IPA, tp gw tetap bisa mengenang ttg 3  IPS 1 dlm dunia pikiran..

Kadang merasa bnyk skali yg ga sempat gw kerjakan sewaktu SMA, merasa waktu bnyk terbuang karna bnyk hal yg tidak gw lakukan... Waktu yg seharusnya bersama tdk digunakan baek2 hingga skrg msh ada rasa sesal... Andaikan ada mesin waktu yg bisa membawa gw kembali ke masa lalu dan kembali badan fisik gw kembali pada saat itu... 

Namun klu bener2 kembali ke masa lalu, smua yg skrg ini akan berubah, smua yg skrg merupakan teman mgkn bkn teman lgi... dan gw mgkn tidak mao begitu..

Sehingga konklusinya adalah, walau apapun kesesalan kita di masa lalu, jgnlah memikirkan untuk mengulang dan mengubahnya, karna itu telah menjadi sejarah dari hidup kita. Kelebihan memikirkan masa lalu akan memakan waktu kita untuk menciptakan masa depan yg lebih menyenangkan.. Tapi bljrlah dari sejarah hidup kita sendiri, dan pastikan kesalahan kita yg dulu tidak terulang lgi.. Sebab hidup tidak bisa diulang!

SP 2009 School of Design and School of Electrical and Electronic Engineering Graduation

Everytime attending/seeing people graduates, there would be unexplainable feeling within me..

Today, i attending the graduation ceremony of my good fren, Jemmy. Graduated from Singapore Polytechnic today! =)

Didn't get to sleep well these few days since send a msg through restaurant city(fb appli) to someone. Finally today get an answer, even though the answer is not what i want, at least it is an answer. Before getting the reply was torturing to me as i'll keep guessing what would the result be. My heart was like floating around, which was very nervous and worry at the same time. 

Today is the last paper for accounting and finance 3rd year frens. Was wishing my frens can do it well. I hope my wishing come true. 

All rite, back to the graduation ceremony, as always, INSPIRING. 

When we reach SP, as usual, photoes taking :) (The pics shall be in FB soon).

Then when it's time to receive the cert, it was actually only allowed Jem's parents and sister, but in the end my frens and i managed to get inside. In there, aside being feeling cold and hungry, i was very inspired by those achievers. One of the guy, name 'Kuriakin' that was doing extremely well, getting GPA of 4, and 8 awards. When he was summoned to get his awards, he stand the longest time. Well, what really inspired me was some speech by the people there, and this Kuriakin. Because he also come from nearby Singapore, Tg. Pinang. From what i knw from my frens, he was also a President of Guitar clubs, he has many frens and he was also active in community service, and he also have part time work. 

This make me feel ashamed, we all come Singapore to study but he could achieve those yet i didnt manage to get anything that i can make my parents proud of me... :(

I was hoping if i can know this guy, earlier before today if possible, mayb could really inspire me to have motivation to achieve something during my school life in Singapore...

Well, attending their graduation ceremony make me looking forwards to my graduation ceremony, which could be next April if nothing goes wrong.. 

For that, i want to buy a digital camera if i pass all subjects.. :P

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=81234&id=577383261&ref=mf

Happy dumpling day!

Today is dumpling day. Normally few days before my brothers, sister and i would help mother to make dumplings. I love the dumplings. Normally we just have dumplings as breakfast, lunch and dinner.. Mom know that i'm picky in eating, she would make more than 1 kind of flavours.

However, this coming 2 years, i wont be able to eat that kind of dumplings again. She said it is becos my grandpa jus passed away. So this 2 years we wont make dumplings. And becos i'm not going back. 

After the exam, i would have finish my study life, provided i pass all papers.

And i'll go into another stage of life, working. I wonder how i'll perform in this stage of life.. ~~"

28 May 2009

Today is where most of my frens finish their exam with Audit. Hope they all doing all rite.

So after today, i might feel lonely.

After taking MA and FR exam, temporary feeling release yet feeling blank, and lost.. 

I still have Strategy to go. I wanted to study, but keep jus empty reading, nothing goes into the mind... My mind is not in the exam huh... ><"

Waking up afraid..

Uuuuh, tomorrow is the day. 26 May 2009, MA exam. 27 FR.

Most of my frens are from Accounting and Finance, so they have to take MA,FR and Audit this year on 26,27, and 28 May. I wonder why the exam date for this year is so challenging.

And there are no less people also taking 2 exams in one day. 

I'm going to have exam on 26 and 27 May.

I was waking up this morning with feeling of scared... I cant imagine for those taking 3 continuously and taking 2 subjects in one day.

Some ppl said, u would afraid becos u are nt ready. Well, partly is true...

I'm afraid now. Afraid i would fail. Afraid that i cant fulfill my parents expectation. Cant fulfill what i have plan and set on to do... and if i fail, hw am i going to face the news that i already have a job waiting for me...

At the same time, i'm afraid that if i were to pass all, that i'm going into a different pathway of life from my frens, i would lose my frens....

There is this girl, whom i like for some time. Never really have any chance to know her better until recently. Really happy being with her in this short period of time. 

Hmm, after write out how i felt, it sure feel better,....

Continue to prepare for exam....

The RAPE of Nanking

I have actually read something about this history b4. And last nite, i watch a video and something relate to the author of the book. Then i knw the author had died.

What the book has written is a history that was almost forgotten from the world and never been teach in the textbook. 

From When i read bout this history, even i might not felt as deeply as the author, even i'm not born in China, i felt something, something like anger, but yet not hatred. 

From history we can see that times never stop, in good times or bad times. It will all passed.

And we can see that life is fragile..

Well, when we actually look back into history, we can always find that our lives now is so much fortune even not perfect yet.

In the past, when human rights haven been promoted, many of inequality happened. But no one has even stand up and say something.

In today, at least more and more people knw that what is human rights. Even inequality still happen...

In today, where we become too peaceful and comfort, we take living for granted that we forget we need to struggle to live. Some people are struggle to survive...

In today, we live with so many support equipment(electronic devices) that we become so lazy.. and forget how the people in the past has lived without them.. 

What i'm trying to say here is not that we should live with a struggling attitude, but we should always remember, life is not simple..

What i'm trying to say here is not that we should throw away all the things we have, but we should be grateful that we can live in today where live my be abundant yet most of the time we take it for granted...

What i'm trying to say is, we should not forget what the history is trying to teach us,.. do not repeat cruel history... one person, one idea, can start a war or end it..

Think big, dun limit and compromise our idea and Vision 

As what we can achieve is as big as our idea and our Vision!

Sharing ideas

Well, all the plans would be nothing if no actions taken.

Today was planning to stay at home and have light revision on MSM. But end up spending the whole day in front of computer.

Hmm, nt the whole day actually. Just nw, April come back with Rinto.

Had some chat with both of them b4 Rinto fall asleep. 

Both of them has come to Sg since 7-7 if i'm nt wrong, so it's almost 4 years since then,.

Talking bout this now might feel that i'm keep thinking about the past. But it's from the past that we reflect how we end up today and where are we going tomorrow.

April has just graduated from NYP, and currently working with a company working for NAVY.

Although he is working, same as me, he is not going to jus walk in the convention way of life which is to work until pension. We were sharing idea bout many things and thinks. He wanted to learn some more about investing, so he was asking about wat we know bout FOREX. 

we also share many ideas bout planting. and his father's working bout 'organic detergent'. 

Spend some time with frens can be great. Although today was jus small chit-chatting, it's good to hear and to be heard.

I miss home

I remember when i first come Sg for study, some people ask me if i would miss home. At that time, my answer was NO, i wont. Well, i remember when i answer that i was thinking, come on, i'm a guy, nt a gal, dun ask me this kind of question. 

Rite now, well, i have to admit, i do miss my home, my parents, my brothers, my sister, and now my nephews :)

Sometimes, it's our bad habit to hide our feelings. I donno, mayb unconsciously i was thinking, if i show my feeling, i show my weaknesses. I'm weak. or i'm just to shy. But as time goes by, i realise that i'm also just human. I have feelings, i have emotions. No need to hide all these. 

Just now, a moment b4 calling home, i cried. Do not what i was i feeling, but i jus cry. Mayb becos of the stress of the exam, or mayb missing my home, or too tired, or just feeling relax..

After crying, i feel a relief, and just take a bath b4 calling home. 

><"

Happy mother's day

Normally the whole family would gather and have dinner. This year dinner would have grandma join us as well. But this year i'm nt able to go back and join for the dinner. Feel bad for nt going back and stay with for today and make her happy. 

Mom, thank you for being such a caring and loving mother for me, and us.

Hope u will always be blessed with long life and healthy!

Even thought i never say to u directly, i would like to let u knw that i love u, mom. 

Sometimes when u call me, i may get irritated and anyhow replying u. But u would patiently and ask me how was the day and all the things. Trying to understand me, and share with me about wat is happening in home. This make me felt that i still being cared. 

I wish for now is to quickly earn enough, and bring u and dad to Taiwan for some holiday. As u always staying at home to take care of the home and us. 

妈， 很抱歉今年没回去陪您过，

但相对您说：辛苦您了，从小照顾我们兄弟。

祝您母亲节快乐，身体健康 ：）

People we care

This feeling can be quite miserable when we see people we care are suffering either mentally or physically yet we cant do many thing to lessen their burden...

Some people said, many choices would lead to confusion in choosing, and yet we might need choices to really know if we have choose the right one. 

Becos of previous experience, rite now, i'm hesitant to make my move becos keep thinking, is she the one that i'm looking for? Is she the one that i'm waiting for? ><''

Omg, wat should i do to enter your world and be a part of your world.

STRESSS

Stress is all i can think of to describe how i am for this whole time...

Some of the times, there will be moment that i dun feel like to bother everything and keep playing games. Like dun reply sms, or dun accept calling... and more serious will be dun like to talk at all even the person calling me. 

Today happen again, i was planning to go to sch for studying,. but end up staying in front of the computer for the whole day..

Well, even though i cant really take up the notes and revise, i did able to pick up my books and read.. Recently i read a book 'S.U.M.O."(Shut Up, Move On). This is really take me into a deep thinking and reflection.

The shut up part, i may have no problem. But I need something or someone that can motivate me to move on. I cant move on without a target. I might be saying clearing all the papers would be my priority target at the moment. But i cant feel the urgency yet. It's as if i feel this is not really important in the big picture. I miss out something which is more important for me, mayb in a bigger perspective, a thing that can make me feel more complete in life. 

What do i lack now? A purpose of life? A soulmate who can really understand me and ready to lemme understand her? A passion that i would do even for free>

Chatting with DC jus nw, recall back how i felt toward 2 persons, AST and LMY. 

I felt guilty to AST 

and , regret to LMY.

---------------------------------------------------------------

As for now, i'm sorry for my frens who are trying to contact me during these period where i'm might in this state, i would ignore you...

_____________________________________

Move on ---- Study ><"