STRESSS

Stress is all i can think of to describe how i am for this whole time...

Some of the times, there will be moment that i dun feel like to bother everything and keep playing games. Like dun reply sms, or dun accept calling... and more serious will be dun like to talk at all even the person calling me. 

Today happen again, i was planning to go to sch for studying,. but end up staying in front of the computer for the whole day..

Well, even though i cant really take up the notes and revise, i did able to pick up my books and read.. Recently i read a book 'S.U.M.O."(Shut Up, Move On). This is really take me into a deep thinking and reflection.

The shut up part, i may have no problem. But I need something or someone that can motivate me to move on. I cant move on without a target. I might be saying clearing all the papers would be my priority target at the moment. But i cant feel the urgency yet. It's as if i feel this is not really important in the big picture. I miss out something which is more important for me, mayb in a bigger perspective, a thing that can make me feel more complete in life. 

What do i lack now? A purpose of life? A soulmate who can really understand me and ready to lemme understand her? A passion that i would do even for free>

Chatting with DC jus nw, recall back how i felt toward 2 persons, AST and LMY. 

I felt guilty to AST 

and , regret to LMY.

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As for now, i'm sorry for my frens who are trying to contact me during these period where i'm might in this state, i would ignore you...

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Move on ---- Study ><"